The Cyber Safety Tech Mum

The Cyber Safety Expert teaching parents how to keep their kids safe on the internet.

How to Monitor your Child’s iMessages

How to Monitor your Child's iMessages

How to monitor your child's imessages

Ding, Ding, Ding!  The constant sound of notifications for new iMessages on your child’s iPad.

The iMessage function on iPads and iPhones is one area that I think is easily overlooked when talking about being involved in a child’s digital life.  As with all types of communication, it opens up risks such as mis-interpretation of messages and messaging things that one wouldn’t normally say upfront to somebody else.

Risks Associated with Children using iMessages

Risk 1

Kids are regularly swapping email addresses with their friends and communicating with them and small groups of friends outside school hours.  All might be go well until a disagreement occurs.

Risk 2

Via apps or online gaming, it is possible for unknown people to invite children to communicate using iMessages.  It is as simple as providing the child with an address. Or your child could give them their address.  Either way, communication begins to take place outside of the app or online game.  So now, your child is communicating with a child they have never met that plays the same game they do.  Or are they?  There are no guarantees that the person on the other end is a child.

The Ultimate Guide to Setting Safety Controls on Childrens Devices

MOST CHILDREN SEE PORN BY ACCIDENT WHEN PERFORMING INNOCENT SEARCHES IN GOOGLE

BUT YOU CAN ACTIVATE SAFETY SETTINGS FOR YOUR CHILD.

Find out how………

Have you considered monitoring your child's iMessages?

I’m not talking about sneakily going into their iPads in the dark of night and looking through their contacts list and reading all of their messages. I’m hoping that if you are reading this, that you have started to create open dialogue with your child when it comes to their online behaviour and activity.  

One option is to discuss with them that in order to keep them safe, you will occasionally ask them to show you their iMessages.  Some will argue that this is an invasion of their privacy.  I argue that this is parenting.   I liken it to knowing where my children are at all times. If they are going to a friends house then I want to know which friend it is.  Back to checking iMessages.   Checks would have to be ‘spot checks.’  Lets keep it real here – kids are very good at deleting things they don’t want their parents to see.

Another option, still based on being open with your child, is to have their messages come through to your Apple device in real time.  This is my chosen method and I use it in conjunction with the first option that I outlined.  I should point out that I am not a parenting expert. I am a mother of 3 and the eldest uses iMessages and they are very aware about why we monitor their messages and how we do it.  I don’t sit around watching messages come through.  

 

How to monitor your child's imessages

 I have a check every now and then. I believe that there has to be a level of trust.  Who grew up without making mistakes?  They are going to happen now and again – they are important learning experiences. If my child’s behaviour seemed to change then I would be checking them in a flash.

You might need some time to digest the above information and decide the best way to handle monitoring of iMessages for your child & family.

I mentioned above that you can setup your apple device to also receive their messages.  If this is something you would like to do, then click here for step-by-step instructions.

If you are interested in setting up parental controls on your child’s iPad, then reserve your seat at my next Online Safety Workshop.

Learn more about using the free safety setting on your child's device
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